Committed

About every two or three days I get a harsh reminder of why I am in the hospital. Yesterday, I was convinced my water had broken and had to wait over 24 hours for my doctor to tell me that I was wrong.

I spent the day unable to do much of anything . . . besides looking at the construction out my window with my binoculars or listen to the same song over and over. I also spent some significant time staring at my whiteboard, which was clearly marked, 29W 1D. This was not far enough to carry this baby. Twenty-nine weekers and twenty-eight weekers are not far enough apart! Whenever I have had the rare opportunity to meet another mother of a 29W preemie, I knew that this baby (and the family) had been through a very similar experience as Miles.

No thank you, I don't want to put a tiny being through that again. Miles will never know how hellish the beginning of his life was, and we will never forget. But, today is a new day and things are looking much better. I had an ultrasound today, one day early due to my "scare" yesterday, and all of the important stuff looks stable. I am committed to the task at hand, my mind is there, let's just hope my body continues to cooperate.

-Lisa